Happiness is what everybody seek for.

once u got it, doesn't mean it will last. my advice?

don't get your hopes too high.

through my experience, these past weeks, I'd put my hopes too high every time i found happiness. and it's true, i am not happy for long. as something would come up, thus turning my smile into a frown or tears in a flash.

Karma. that is what i am thinking of.
a punishment for all my wrongdoings? Every time i feels like life is perfect, those perfection would be ripped away from me in the blink of an eye.

I faked my smiles, i faked my laughter.
but as a friend had said,
"Ain, your eyes can't lie the slightest bit of lie."
i've got to admit it's true.
i can't hide my tears. i am terrified of my own fear.

what fear?

Monophobia is an acute fear of being alone and having to cope without a specific person.

Paranoia is a thought process characterized by excessive anxiety or fear, often to the point of irrationality and delusion.

XOXO